Working for the cult

I work for a cult.

That’s what it is.

If you work for a large global conglomerate, you can probably relate. I thought of it today. The cult of belief intensifies this time of year when most organizations are trying their damnedest to squeeze out the last crappy morsel of the desperate numbers and financials they need at this time of year to fulfill their annual goals, hence bonuses. Like all good cults, the ultimate arbiter of conscientiousness is exhausting self-interest.

Our A/R department and cash collections appears to be under a zombie spell in December. I’ve never witnessed such single-minded, numb persistence on the part of any group of individuals (except maybe for the Scientologists) that exists in our Credit and Collections department this time every year. The humanity dissipates and the department retreats to a battalion of pencil-pushing dronehood buzzing around their unifying goal of collecting, collecting, collecting. The same people I’ve spoken with on friendly terms all year turn into faceless orbs of corporate-induced mania.

It’s a cult!

Working for such a large corporation means you are a cult member. Only if you find yourself steeped deeply in the culture while keeping a clear head and an outsider’s perspective, can you witness, in intricate and sickening detail, the cultish rantings of the modern work place.

From Wikipedia’s Cult entry, the predominant distinguishing element of a cult are its “bizarre” and “abnormal” practices and ceremonies. Wiki adds, “Sociologists still maintain that unlike sects, which are products of religious schism and therefore maintain a continuity with traditional beliefs and practices, “cults” arise spontaneously around novel beliefs and practices.” There. A cult is differentiated by its “unique” personality and simultaneous alienation from accepted patterns of thought or belief. A cult arises independently, if you will, of long-standing or established patterns of dogma. This is how Christian religions can ward off accusations of culthood. Because they are so common as to be “accepted.”

Which I suppose points away from my insistence that international corporate business rings that control most American industry are similar to cults. But they are! The cult leader is the organization. Many times the organization is deified within the realm of corporate fundamentalism and catchy slogans are paraded across our visual landscape with the intent or reinforcing said stupidity repeatedly until the basic gist of the company is that stupid slogan which is repeated to the level of autosuggested hypnotism. The cult leader becomes the slogan, and vice versa. The corporate slogan is a chant, and all corporate denizens are encouraged to chant it, but only within the confines and dictates preordained by the international marketing rings who watch out for the corporation’s best interests; they are encouraged to quip the mantra at all opportunities with the ostensible aim of elevating the cult leader to international streams of godly status within the global financial markets.

The cult is a brainwasher. It elicits a need and consequently, supplies a supply and cure for its followers. The cult is responsible for a self-devouring serpent trail of beliefs and acts on the part of its cult members (employees).

Logic takes a tumble and reason dissolves when the management, those with the largest stake in perpetuating the corporate cult, hover with crazed eyes and will you, beguile with lusty commands of hollow motivation, to try harder and harder and harder. Ultimately, they are second tier cult leaders and they embellish their position on the backs of the toiling masses. The toiling masses who likewise lose themselves in the magnetic demands and circular rewards of the cult.

Some look on and must shut up if they wish to remain ensconced in the machinations of such a lecherous organism.

After all. It’s a job.