Alas, freedom is nothing left to lose. Right?
When spoken of in these terms, the preponderant understanding of freedom insinuates someone who possesses nothing, owns nothing, has no one. In this materialistic modernity we breathe, this is how we define “nothing.” Nothing rains externally on our being.
“Nothing to lose” imprints itself in our minds as a state of utter moral and physical destitution where we are not tied to debt or personal attachments or ideals. Truly a “free” soul we think with not an ounce of warmth in our bones. Freedom is frowned upon in a materialistic society. In a cluttered civilization of subhuman narcissism, freedom is the antithesis to responsibility and acculturation.
On the other hand, I would argue that even the filthiest, most abhorrent homeless man is capable of having “something to lose.”
Having something to lose, conversely, has nothing to do with assets or glittery diamonds. Something to lose is a state of mind. It’s an acceptance that co-exists with denial of the self-defined value of that which shallow people grasp vainly for the right of title. If the homeless man values his wretched existence and places external value on it by virtue of his egotistical hungers, then this very filthy existence we vomit at is something to lose for the homeless man. It’s this sense of private and indefinable self-valuation that determines whether the loss of something is accepted or battled.
I thought of this because I frequently use this blog as a podium for anti-consumerist rants, but ultimately, what I’m preaching is different. I didn’t realize until now. The freedom I seek, my betrayal and rebuttal of modern materialist plastic props we worship are really stated simply…those which I can LOSE peacefully. The state of utter abandon in which loss is consummately accepted, is freedom. Acceptance of loss (in its potential form) does not necessarily connote that the loss would have no effect on your soul. Rather, it is the ability, and willingness, to accept loss, to integrate it into your possible outcomes. Similar in structure to all the possibilities that endure in the quantum world of probability waves.
In our world, everything is possible, but like the corresponding overlap of these possibilities with the highest probabilities which unify to create the darkest shaded areas of occurrence, your life of nothing to lose is merely the relinquishment to fate and exaggerated acceptance that the probability wave is its own cruelest master.
Nothing left to lose is not not caring. Nothing left to lose is caring, but calmly accepting as a surplus quotient. And I truly mean accepting.
Not lip service.
Not playing tough guy.
Not being a plastic stoic cowboy living the unflappable fantasy when all is going well in your air conditioned chamber.
It’s about truly living the probability wave, it’s about seeing life’s events (your fucking life) as a culmination of an infinite series of undetectable strati which slowly embroil themselves in a fight to the surface as the rest of your life gyrates uneasily as it parts and gives way to fate. Or loss.
See, nothing left to lose is retracting the fact, the paradigm, that you ever had anything to lose to begin with. It is to renounce fate that never was.
Nothing left to lose is to start anew and recalibrate your expectations, because there are no expectations.
Nothing left to lose is to shed that which led you here. It is to vanquish your footsteps. To erase your legacy, your historical path. It is to truly stand alone, empty, in this spot and to have nothing, then, now, or tomorrow. To lose is to lose yourself in the probability wave. Accept, swallow and step aside as the probability wave flies by in a pitch-black, turbulent, dusty cloud.
The greatest challenge of our mortality is to have lived it.
To have let it pass while moving forward anew in a post-mortality world.
For everything you had to lose is lost. Gone.
Once the past is lost, and all that you were and are and will be, is lost and released, the void and eternal blankness will accept you.
For you have now lost. This is the point when you have nothing left.