Kobe Bryant and teaching men to behave

This was my morning online sojourn.

First, Facebook, where some of my friends roundly and smugly criticized Kobe Bryant’s playground outburst. What the hell, who cares, I thought over my morning coffee. Who cares. Oh my, Kobe acted like a man. Horrors. The link that was provided by my oppressively mature friend was this one in which the details of his ridiculous NBA fine are detailed. Apparently, in our mannerly society, men playing a man’s sport must act like Emily Post now. I was getting amped up about the story and thinking of what I would write about it tonight. As I read of this overwrought travesty, I saw a link near the bottom of the page. It was included in a series of paid links and the one that caught my eye was an article entitled “10 Things You Should Never, Ever Say” in that smarmy, eye-rolling bitchy written version of an audible utterance. Never, ever! I clicked on it and it took me to a website, Man of the House. I browsed a bit, and the more I saw, the more I realized I was wading into a sea of self-righteous chick Kool-aid written by too many idle female hands (and male hands under the duress of marital enslavement). Many of the articles, while purporting to concern male “personal improvement” really seemed nothing but obliquely sheltered pieces written from the surreptitious perspective of women whose primary roles in life appears to be that of whittling manhood down to a penis-challenged masquerade of masculinity.

Man of the House leads wayward men on the righteous PC path of enslavement to modern feminine sensibilities. Many of the articles appear to goad men into some kind of maternal swamp behind the fulsome litany of self-improvement concepts and exercises, but which are simultaneously written with a knife clenched behind the back.

As an example, the aformentioned “10 Things…” article lists ten statements, putatively condescending and lacking in the validation of female hysterics. The fact they should never be uttered is made clear in the form of an ultimatum you might hear from a power tripping girlfriend. You should never, ever say these things or God forbid, you will piss her off and she might leave you, or gulp…not put out.

You’re missing the point
That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard
You’re overreacting

To name a few.

These are trigger phrases that generally piss touchy women off because more often than not, they are absolutely true and pierce the heart of the distorted and illusory female armor. If you call a woman out for her rancid behavior, you risk eliciting some serious wrath. Real men can live with this. Their manhood is worth any amount of feminine fury they may endure. Unlike Beta men of the house who scurry away and retreat into the safety of the anonymous shadows the minute their wife or girlfriend even looks at them the wrong way. Men of the house can’t handle women, thus they need pointed,Betaized lessons in tiptoeing around the treacherous female playground.

“Man of the House” is clearly aimed at the 21st Century married father. The blog appears as one your wife might put together with the purpose of belittling your manhood in scintillating doses of sitcom reductionism. It oozes that wifely condescending and patronizing attitude; it’s as if she’s treating you like a 7-year-old boy with the intellectual expectations to match. And you, the sorry excuse for a man that you are, submit meekly. She might claim she is trying to help you realize your role as “man of the house” but in reality, she is grooming you to be the Beta of the House. Man of the house is misleading because it is not about being your own man. It’s about being the sub-male that she wants and that will ultimately curry her favor with female peers while reinforcing gay friendom. They live lives of mental vacuity and expect everything to follow such a scripted bullshit trajectory. In appealing to husbands, the site’s feature stories play up the femininzed and petty rules of girlie etiquette while adulating the lavish consumerism that women adore in their men. Look, I’m not against male grooming or men learning to put together a nice meal. I don’t much care for the context this site presents these activities in. They are painted as knee-jerk requirements modern man must obey in simpering displays of submission to the illogical whims of this culture of women. Marriage is shaped by slow, cultural indoctrination.

I posted once before about how I feel the inadvertent role of modern marriage is to denature the strength and vibrancy of masculinity. Whereas in the past women married for reasons of child-rearing stability (and stability in general), the modern status-oriented plastic attention whore prizes marriage solely as a symbolic ceremony of consumerist union. Modern women seek marriage to perpetuate its sacrilegious distortion by treating it as nothing but a cheap social ornamentation. Man of the House is simply a blueprint (one of many) for the enduring usurpation of traditional marriage by today’s feminized pop culture which reduces manhood to simpering rows of impotent pawns and revels in keeping them around as obligatory mantel pieces. Man of the House is just one of many such “tutorials” out there, enforcers, of the marriage industry and its ensuing dystopia. This is certainly not to insinuate that all husbands are intrinsically weak or henpecked. There are many modern husbands who still boast traditional measures of manhood. However, it’s this commercial, consumerist, ownership society that has sought to transform men into bumbling serfs obeying every whim of their status-fixated and over-empowered wives.

Man of the House should have an article entitled “What Not To Say In The Middle of a Fierce Basketball Game.” Because the Betas and women writing behind the scenes surely know how a man should behave if he is to be dethroned. And it is nothing like the rambunctious and unrestrained defiance of a wildly Alpha basketball player. Actually, they can save column space and bandwidth by merely advising men of one simple fact: don’t act like an NBA player in your marriage. Act like a neutered sitcom character who can’t stand up to his overbearing and sensible wife.

We must see to it that marriage only serves to replenish man’s dwindling sense of modern non-masculinity.