Girl Game’s post about ‘walking like a champion’…a male perspective

So there’s this chick, LILGRL who belongs to the cast of bloggerettes over at Girl Game.
She posted a blog yesterday entitled Turn Heads: Walking like a Champion in which she lists/outlines a series of pointers for her charm school flunky readers.

Her advice is actually very good as it details the manner in which women should comport themselves in public, especially during strolling and perambulating (sorry, I felt the urge to use that stinking word). I believe this is important as most people truly have no self-awareness when it comes to their movements and mannerisms, and the very real effect they have on the perception they give others.  

Many women seem to possess an innate and primal instinct for this stuff. I call it being “tied” into one’s environment; along with this personal awareness and skillful reading of the world around them comes the supplemental ability to “read” the minds of others which is essentially nothing more than applying a knowledge of body language and verbal cues and subconsciously (usually) interpreting and extracting this same knowledge for predictive uses. Hence, “women’s intuition.” It’s an intuition anyone can have but which we call “women’s” since historically women are the gender which seems to harness such environmental awareness more skillfully.

Bottom line is…LILGRL is letting the pussy out of the bag, and the knowledge of many may end up becoming the knowledge of a few more clueless, and it may also help put a face on the knowledge that many suspected they had.

In her post, LILGRL concentrated on the act of walking while ensuring that women learn to direct and mold it to convey absolute femininity while luring men into their strutting persona’s. As I read her list, it occurred to me that many of her observations should apply equally to men. Traditionally men have not concerned themselves with this catwalk crap; with the practice of walking like a “real man,” of carrying oneself like the alpha king of the jungle.  Nevertheless, many men should start paying more attention to their walking behavior.  Based on my observations.

There is a school of thought that your mind follows your body. If men gave more thought to their strut and related movements, they might find their confidence increasing in tandem to their newfound walk.

Here is LILGRL’s list which I will attempt to inject with a good dose of testosterone, give it some balls:


“Keep your shoulders back”  Definitely applies to the gentlemen.  Stooped shoulders and a hunched back scream out defeat, resignation.  If nothing else, they invite lack of respect in others and betray a lack of gravity.  Imagine a POTUS slumping around an international summit in Geneva.  What’s that you say?  Richard M. Nixon did it?  Need we go further…?  Conversely, it should be pointed out that keeping the shoulders back also means keeping them relaxed for chrissakes.  How many extremely uptight guys have I seen roboting around here with their shoulders slung back in unnatural states of stiffness?

“Keep all dangly things to a minimum”  LILGRL’s gender-specific point was that large bags, purses, coats, etc., interfere with a woman’s natural movements and should be avoided at all costs.  I don’t believe this is such a problem for men whose gaits are strong and undeterred by anything so meaningless as a bag or trenchcoat.  Unlike a woman who must present a feathery and feminine (catlike) walk which will appear deflected and ruffled by extra personal baggage.

“Wear heels”  Actually, I think this is a good time to make pertinent point about “male heels.”  If you’re short (like me), avoid wearing shoes or boots with ample heels.  It looks too much like you’re trying to “lift” and if you’re very short (like me), the heels might tend to overpower your puny stature, bordering on the comical.  Be proportionate.

“Keep your head still”  That’s right, you guys pay attention too.  There’s no reason you need to be dodging and jerking as you walk along unless you’re training for the next title fight.  A still head accentuates the gender qualities of the wearer.  On a woman, it demonstrates class and luxurious femininity;  on men, confidence and a resolute nature.  Strength even, a man with the unflappable nature of a boulder.

“Feel the beat!”

“Put one foot in front of the other “

“Point your toes”

OK, this stuff is extremely gay and only applies to women or guys who decide they would rather take a walk down Santa Monica Boulevard.  That said, I will offer a special related note to the guys looking to bolster their manly walk:  try working on a swagger.  And by that, I mean a nice subtle swing to your shoulders, a deliberate and slightly “ready” swing to your arms.  Don’t overdo it because then you look like some clownish hoodlum looking for trouble.  Light and easy but steady.  As you perfect that swagger let the thought “Yeah I’m a bad motherfucker” run through your head.  Study some bad guy roles in movies and television.

“Pace yourself”  Yeah man, this one is very important, especially for men.  We’re all used to seeing chicks dart around, ricocheting around self-importantly.  It’s the nature of the beast.  The female nature is controlled by its environment and reactive so if she rushes around you can’t fault her.  However, a man does not rush around needlessly.  A man in in control (or at least that is the image he must portray) and the world is under his control.  He controls time, he controls the ether through which he moves.  A man rushing about like a chicken without a head looks like a child.  

Important note: There are times we must hurry.  Late for a meeting, the train, a date even…flagrant sauntering is not an option.  That’s fine…learn to walk fast without looking like a spastic freak.  I’ve seen men who walked fast and purposely but in a physically contained and efficient manner.  They did not flail about as they sped wherever it was they were speeding.  Each step, each arm swing, was a succinct and efficient movement which presented a combined series of movements which give the impression of a dangerously unstoppable race car approaching the finish line.

“Wear something that shows off your legs”  Mm, whatever, for the ladies only.  On a sidenote…remember when it was semi/borderline/questionably fashionable for guys to wear shorts with a tie?  I thank the fashion gods that movement died quick and silently.

“Make eye contact”  Yes yes yes.  This is not to say that you need to have staring contests with each and every person you encounter on the street.  As you cross paths, keep back, don’t leer, control your expression lest you look like Marty Feldman as you try to uphold the sacred decree of “make eye contact.”  Relax.  If you make a production out of making eye contact, you are sure to look like an irreputable freak out loose on your own recognizance.  If you don’t relax and meet eyes with the calm appraisal fitting a man of confidence, you will scare men, women, children and pets.  Smile.

Go to work!

2 Replies to “Girl Game’s post about ‘walking like a champion’…a male perspective”

  1. David you showing off your legs lately? Great post David… showing of the legs is definitely a must. Its one of those things that makes heads turn. Its amazing of all things what the eye actually focuses on. Ladies take note, eye contact goes a long way…

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