The Great Icy Tit Challenge! In search of a noble cause.

 

I’m constitutionally unable to appreciate this Ice Bucket Challenge stupidity.

 

It’s not that I don’t care about ALS or Lou Gehrig or whatever bullshit this social circus is about. Of course it’s great that people raise money for disease research as they see fit. But for heaven’s sake, man, just write a check and spare me the dense theatrics. How many morons must I see waiting apprehensively in plastic chairs just before a bucket of ice water is poured over their head. I’m sick of it. I can’t relate to the way people comport themselves in order to boast proudly and conspicuously that they are taking steps to improve the state of the human race! It’s a fool’s show! Hear my altruistic roar across the throbbing egotistical pulses of Facebook and Youtube!

 

It’s the Ice Bucket Challenge; I challenge you to do something meaningless just to prove you are giving money away.

 

Dumb.

 

So anyway, I heard that the hot, cocksucking-lips slut, Taylor Swift, succumbed to the Challenge idiocy. The thought of Taylor drenched in ice cold water sorta stirred by loins, I gotta say.

 

Taylor ice

 

Oh yeah. Too bad the photo sucks.

 

Now then. Unfortunately, tragically even, something else came along which put the figurative ice water all over my horny embers. Goodbye Taylor, hello Lena!

 

Lena ice

 

Oh god. For all forces of fleshy good, there are evil counterforces waiting to assault your gentle eyes behind the protrusion of distended swimwear and legions of alabaster cellulite.

 

But alas, I saw another ice bucket challenge female participant in my “personal realm” and it occurred to me that this tedious collective adventure of do-goody-ism might actually be channeled into a productive, and if nothing else, visually pleasing, spin-off from the Ice Bucket Challenge. I shall call it the Great Icy Tit Challenge.

 

I shall gather the most pleasing photos of women raising money to fight paralysis and catalog them for another charity: male depravity.

 

Let the fun begin!

 

ice challenge

 

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There is this from a Youtube video.

 

icy whoops

 

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And this. Unfortunately, it appears some women have foreseen the inadvertent arousal their wet body may provide to ogres like me, so they flatten that shit out with a chastity (sports) bra. :(

 

ice challenge more

 

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Meh. Not all tits are created equal, but still, can’t go wrong with a wet female body splashing around…

 

icy pink