Toolism? Toolhardy? Toolish? Toolsome? Toolhood? And the list goes on…

I’m fixated with invectives and adverbs and adjectives and any other sort of plastic manipulation of the English language that conveys my meaning like getting hit on the head with a brick.

Which is cool because I doubt that “toolhardy” is in any unabridged mainstream dictionary in existence. But it’s an awesome artificial word.

From the base word tool.

I pride myself on being the anti-tool. Self-delusion is a terrible thing. Some of us may escape the normal social dose of toolism, but none of us can ever escape it completely.

According to the Urban Dictionary “tool” entry, there are 3 definitions of the term. No. 2 is my favorite and what I think of when I describe someone as a tool:

Get this: even the basic, concious and prideful act of trying not to be tool…makes you a tool! Damnit! You can’t win. It’s a circular and Sisyphean task this whole thing about trying not to be tool.

In order to be toolfree while not falling into the disgusting trappings of making anti-tool your identity, you must slip into a Zen-like state of existence and sever your self-identity for a few precious moments. Relinquish longings, blunt the ego.

So long toolhood!