Our modern struggle to be resilient

So after almost 48 years of doing my best to understand people, of trying to weigh their benefits and faults in between all their teeming annoyances and pleasures, I think I’ve finally unearthed the human characteristic I value in them most. It took me many years of pensive examination, of trial and error, of experimentation and denial, for me to tease out the singular trait I esteem above all others. I’ve scrutinized those I respect as well as those I despise. I’ve ruminated at length into the sleepy night as I uneasily pondered the ill offerings of my fellow man. I’ve sat on lonely boulders looking over the precipice of steep cliffs from the foot of raging orange sunsets and wondered about that which I respect in others.

The realization can only dawn after a certain level of personal maturity is attained. When immaturity still cloaks your melodramatic notions, your sincerest nature is subdued by egotistical notions of “good vs bad” and “right vs wrong.” You lack the capability to realize that which your nature dictates. For much of your life, much of your exploration, you find a type of person appealing when you’re young, yet the same person might be entirely distasteful to you later in life. Sadly, most people don’t experience this awakening, and at the very least, are not aware of it. You are only privy to it if you are open to it, meaning that you are mindful of it. Only in such a way, because of your lucidity, can you embrace and utilize the notion for your own growth and awareness. If you are ignorant to it, you may assimilate the knowledge subconsciously, but this only infers that you may make counter-productive or irrelevant choices in the future because knowledge of your awakening is the necessary precursor and “roadmap” to personal growth.

Perhaps the realization dawns on you in your simplest slumber. You learn it; the revelation settles, for you are now ready to embrace it. You learn what you value most in others.

I discovered that I cherish resilience most in others. I value and admire it. Yes, I admire instances of breathtaking resilience I’ve witnessed in others.

Resilience is rarer than we might think. It is a fleeting jewel of human nature. Resilience has been knocked down a peg or two in our modern age. Resilience is a sense of strength and undeterred personal purpose. Resilience is the ability to, in the most mundane analogous sense, to resume your form after taking a psychic blow. Psychic blows can, and frequently do, emerge from the cold structure of our physical world. Furthermore, emotional assaults can cripple us and leave us writhing on the ground. Resilience cannot be learned. You cannot summon it from nothing after indulging in a series of overpriced “workshops” involving a lot of blabbing and bullshit fluff. Resilience is a birthright and it may be present in degrees. But the penultimate form of resilience, the type we think of, is rare.

Resilience is having an “emotional jaw” that lets you battle in the ring when lesser mortals would have tumbled to the floor. I treasure resilience because I believe that the younger generations, mine included, have less resilience than the older generations who lived through a degree of suffering and hardship we have insulated away with the wonders of technology. How can resilience sprout from a race of people who, as they exist now, boast of laziness, gluttony and vanity as vehicles of excellence?

Resilience is a result of hardiness of spirit and strength of soul. It is persistence, it is not muscle. Resilience is a byproduct of an enduring sense of self that can only bloom in the arid hinterlands of personal trials and tribulations. Resilience is a gentle callousing that envelopes and motivates your comprehension of purpose.

Technology, as it progresses incrementally, soothes the trials while playing the role of buffer against the harsh rigors of our reality. The edge is gone courtesy of science and technology and now we are left with a soft, amorphous civilization that has lost possession of that historical sense of resilience earned in painful days past.

You can see visible examples of resilience in your daily life. You will witness as some people, confronted with sudden and uncomfortable stimuli, appear to “recoil” for a moment or two. Some people take longer to come out of their recoil state than others. The duration of your recoil state correlates to resilience. Do you flinch, do you remain unduly fixated on the unpleasant trigger, or do you march forward?