Béisbol has been bery, bery good to me. Drunk Mejicans? I don’ know…

Oh no, my peeps up to mayhem and destruction once again at what is quickly becoming a barrio oasis awash in blue, Dodger Stadium!

In fact, just a little over a year ago, Bryan Stow, a White guy and Giants fan from up north proved once and for all that this can be a precarious and less than endearing intersection of personal traits if you want to spend some quality time at Dodger Stadium on Opening Day, as he did March 31 of last year. Giants fans are essentially persona non grata at Dodger Stadium. The jeering, the hostility, the thinly-veiled threats. It’s not pretty. I witnessed such a mood erupt during one Dodger/Giant game I went to way back in 2003. Still, despite the less than warm reception for Giants fans, once the game is over, everyone leaves, and tension subsides. End of story. Except for Opening Day, 2011. Bryan Stow was jumped by 2 fans and brutally beaten within inches of his life in the parking lot after the game. He was left in a coma, and even now his recovery is slow but steady. He’s still in bad shape. I wrote about it the day after. I shook my blog head and made some presumptions about the unknown assailants. In the days that followed, a composite drawing was released which basically supported my unfounded notions. Hispanics, baldies, tattoos..the obligatory toolkit of gangster signals. Within days, the LAPD made a grand, overstated scene of arresting a tattooed Hispanic guy with a warrant. He was ratted out by his parole officer but it turned out he’d never even been to a Dodger game. At first he seemed the perfect OJ glove fit for the Stow beating. Until his alibis began to actually hold water. Slowly, the case against him dissolved. Then police finally did nab the two men responsible for Stow’s beating. They were Louie Sanchez and Marvin Norwood, two bad news bears from the Inland Empire who didn’t exactly fit the bill I had offered to explain Stow’s assailants. They weren’t all that young, I don’t believe they were inner city gang members, and even the Mexican one didn’t look very Hispanic. Still, Sanchez had the shaved head and tats that I conjectured.

Well, my peeps, proving once again that they can’t be kept down for long, were at the center of some more thoughtless violence inflicted upon another fan yesterday following the Dodger/Cardinal game, part of the crazed weekend of sports and BS I railed about yesterday. The difference being that this time the suspects were apprehended immediately, and though we know their names, we don’t know what they look like…but knowing the names, we can guess. The victim is unidentified.

LOS ANGELES (KTLA) — Four men have been arrested for allegedly beating a man in the parking lot at Dodger Stadium, in an apparent case of road rage turned violent.

According to police, it happened as two cars were leaving the parking lot following Sunday night’s game against the Saint Louis Cardinals.

The four suspects were booked on suspicion of assault with a deadly weapon.

Bail was set at $30,000 for each of the four, identified as Arthur Morales, 30, of Monrovia; Alan Trujillo, 29, of Los Angeles; Ulisis Briceno, 26, of Los Angeles; and Alejandro Briceno, 29, of La Crescenta.

Police say it started when one driver cut another off, resulting in a minor traffic collision.

The victim and his pregnant girlfriend were sitting in the passenger seat of a Chevrolet Impala in line to exit the stadium Sunday afternoon when it became involved in a fender bender with a Toyota Camry.

The victim believed that the Camry had backed into his Impala.

The other party thought his Camry had been hit.

The drivers of the cars involved got out and started arguing, police said.

After the fight turned physical, three people who were in a third car got out and joined in.

Witnesses said they ganged up on the victim while the woman looked on.

“A very minor collision… basically just tapped bumpers,” LAPD Cmdr. Andy Smith said, describing the accident.

“One driver gets out and starts yelling at another driver. He gets out. That escalates into a fist fight,” Smith said.

“Then three other individuals from another car come in and join the fight and hold one guy down, and he’s kicked and punched and beaten while he’s on the ground.”

Reminds me of something a White waitress I used to work with in my bartending days told me. She said you never can just get in a fight with one Mexican. If you start fighting with a Mexican, she maintained, all of his homeys would flood out of nowhere and gang up on you. They fight like roaches is basically what she insinuated. I didn’t completely agree and still don’t, but it’s not the first time I’ve heard this fable. The idiots at Dodger Stadium sure didn’t do much to extinguish such theorizing, did they? Stay in your car, let the men fight. What they did, that behavior of running out of the car and holding the guy down strikes me very chickenshit. And the four names…yup, la Raza baby! You can dress us down, but you can’t take us out (or definitely not to a Dodger game). What gives?

These clowns need to get a grip and shrug off the booze and testosterone. The crap that Mexicans have to live down in White eyes is formidable enough. Then we have nimrods/caricatures like these guys who continue to do all in their feeble-minded ability to perpetuate all that is troubled with the Mexican image. Who the hell wants to go to a Dodger game now, knowing that some drunken “Jose” is going to pull off his backwards Dodger cap and start trouble with in the parking lot for the most trivial shit?

There is so much inherent un-PC drama written all over yesterday’s Dodger incident that I suspect many cultured and mild-mannered folks are biting their civil tongues. Look, I’ll just say it. Dodger Stadium would be so much better if it wasn’t for young drunken Mexican hoodlums with tattoos, Dodger jerseys, baggy jeans, and hostile attitudes. Upon hearing this story, I would bet the most common reaction in lily-white Socal enclaves was something along the lines of “not the Mexicans again!” Of course, no one will cop to this. I will, publicly. It was my first reaction. As a Mexican, I have the highest standards for my ethnic compatriots and unfortunately, many of the young American-born 2nd- and 3rd-generations are a sorry lot who shame the rest of us.

On a “lighter” note, there were some choice comments from equally unrestrained readers of KTLA’s news site. It’s a feast for the eyes.

I must give SicknTired the award for most clever distortion of the name of Dodger Stadium’s hilly home in Northeast Los Angeles, Chavez Ravine. “Chavez latrine.” Ha! Love it. I’m SicknTired too, man.

OK, what the hell. What is this 21st Century rebirth of Carrie Nation talking about? Just admit you don’t like booze. Baseball games and beer are synonymous you goody-two-shoe’d dork. What you mean is that it’s the combination of beer + Mexicans that is causing trouble. I suspect you don’t only want to ban beer from games, I think you’d like to ban Hispanics. And actually, that is a good point. I’m afraid I can’t argue with it!

Hmm. Wow, if in fact this tidbit surmounts the normal frightening inaccuracies of internet chatter and turns out to be true, it changes the whole complexion of the incident, don’t you think?

I love this one! Dermot is a man after my own heart. He says it straight up. What everyone thinks and knows. Of course, it’s nothing but a thought experiment, we know it will never happen. Can you imagine if it did? I would like to lay out certain new “ground rules” for Dodger games which are guaranteed to snuff out most post game parking lot mayhem. We just need Magic Johnson to listen. 1) No beer sales to Hispanics under 50, 2) No Hispanics with shaved heads, 3) No Hispanics with visible facial or neck tattoos, 4) All groups of Hispanics must be accompanied by at least one senior citizen who is directly related to the group, 5) All male Hispanics under 25 must answer one question (randomly generated) accurately before being allowed entrance. The question will be simple but will also go a long way in determining the assimilation and relative intelligence of said subject and would filter out the abundant riff-raff. For instance, all gang members one night might be asked simply, “What is basil?” Anyone who can’t answer this gets kicked back to the curb so they can spend the rest of the evening with a 40 of Colt 45 on the curb where they live.

I think logic133 is the screen name for the waitress I used to work with. She said the exact same thing, but she wasn’t quite as harsh.

Something tells me this commenter is Mexican. He uses the word baboso which I don’t think any White person in the world knows of. He seems to bemoan the inability of some clowns to control themselves after drinking, and alludes to the fact (indirectly) that they ruin it for everybody. So true. Plus the guy’s spelling and grammar are epic failures. He’s my carnal!