I’ve written here (incessantly and compulsively, at times) about my obese female co-worker.
Rather than letting this post devolve into a customary spiteful, adjective-laced verbal tool of catharsis (and this bitch pushes all my triggers so splendidly), I’ll try to keep this thought more confined, clinical, specific.
I’ll just say, as a preface, that the gods could not have shown a more cruel sense of black irony by bringing her and I together in the same shared office.
It’s a cosmic pairing, in some respects, ranking up there with oxygen and fire, chlorine and ammonia, oil and vinegar. This broad is the anti-me in so many respects.
She inhabits her job by virtue of a favor, payback. Culturally perpetuated social grease. There is simply no other possibility. She is loud and ignorant and plainly stupid. She has zero analytical abilities, she’s lazy, and on a personal level, she is pure sloth. Her lack of focus spellbinds me.
She doesn’t know much, and worse, she is aggressively aware of this. She holds the fact close to heart and wards off situations that might reveal this to innocent passersby.
Her present role is one she has never held, but since she has worked in the “Industry” before, she found herself with her fat foot in the door and our equally clueless managers who lavish her with undeserved kindness and thoughtfulness, aren’t of much noteworthy personal quality themselves.
She has many tools for “compensating” for her lack of acumen and ineptitude. It’s obvious she has spent the entirety of her life refining, honing, these masquerade skills in which she mimics intelligence and ability. The fact she is far from an intellectual powerhouse has made her rely immensely on these evolved skills of bullshit and personality and that is what she is now: a skilled practitioner of camouflage in which she assumes the appearance of “smart.” Most fall for it.
One ploy I’ve noticed (in fact, she did it again yesterday, prompting this dirge) is that she exploits the ignorance and idiocy of our managers by fostering and creating a sense of disharmony, dissonance, tension, antagonism, in her loud bellicose, fat lady style. She has a loud, booming voice which definitely fools people of a Western nature. People being of such diminished, self-involved standards, aren’t aware of her charade, but I see it unfold every moment of the day.
She practices this illusion to portray an aura of aptitude, sharpness, brilliance even, but no one knows any better. Everyone is just as batshit stupid and crazy as she.
Whereas most of her managers and co-workers feed into the tension and antagonism she foments, I ignore it, literally; I don’t acknowledge her nonsense and thus, neutralize her vitriol of the stupid. Her scam is that people respond in kind rather than analyze what she is saying. People are emotional, lazy and visceral creatures. They do not think, they feel. She elicits “feelings” and misguided passions in order to distract from the matter at hand: she doesn’t know shit. And in fact, the unfounded tension she nurtures adds to this artificial allure of intelligence and adeptness.
In other words, she’s got them all fooled.