Cult of Careerism

I was reading one of those ambitious-minded msn.careerbuilder.com articles yesterday which proved to be typically annoying as far as career advice crap tends to be. Annoying because most of the stuff you read on “Cult Of Career” websites, such as careerbuilder and say, Monster or Linkedin, is sophomoric drivel perpetrated upon legions of up-and-coming soul-trading aspiring robots who simply believe that the key to happiness and fulfillment in this life is measured in annual income, random “investment” debts and retirement packages. These are people who begin emulating the Cult Of Careerism quickly and hurriedly don the habits and appearance of the typical modern consumerist cog in the capitalist wheel. The Cult of Careerism has created a rabidly conformist and self-absorbed mindset that values self-advancement to insane levels of compulsion. Some of the crap you read on these sites sounds like HR-spewed scripts. People who clutter the corporate byways of modern America love to recite all the trite trendy phrases which seem to spread across the workforce like a vapid wildfire of mimicry. I decry the loss of individualism and unique boldness in such herd-like behavior. The Cult of Careerism erects an edifice of artificiality that becomes the paradigm and value system which those who wish to join and partake begin to assume as their elemental character which seeps into all aspects of their life.

The article I read was “You don’t have to be a CEO to act like one” and it represented the normal pile of career-advancing and striving refuse that celebrates formulaic corporatist thinking and goal-oriented worship. The “CEO” mentality draws such aspirants like moths to light. Anything laced with the “CEO” moniker is worshiped with a religious fervor. The “CEO” is what these people want to be, how they wish to think and live. It’s a masquerade they seek to earn the privilege of wearing.

The first paragraph and first bullet point in how to “think like a CEO” was some pedantic Kool-Aid-style mindless rote.

Hire to your culture, and be hired by a culture you respect

Each company has its own ideas and values that promote the company’s vision. Successfully joining a work culture means better working relationships, increased productivity and a more enjoyable work experience. “Our culture is based on ethics, value creation and innovation,” says Robert L. Johnson, founding CEO of the Black Entertainment Network. “Culture is fundamental. People have to know how culture functions, what is OK, [what is] good and what is not done, or tolerated, in this company.”

When a company finds people who share their ideals, they create a strong cultural force that can push ideas forward. Whether you’re a part of a company or looking to join one, study that company’s culture and determine if you’re a good fit.

Who the hell talks like this?

Every stupid company in this land will recite the same boast. Perhaps the adjectives change slightly, but it’s always the same whitewashed, Stepford Wives banality that guides its presentation.

“Ethics, value creation and innovation.” Wow. Impressive. Still, show me one company that does not outwardly pride itself on similar values. This is stupid. These are empty rah-rah cheers and sentiments that mean nothing. People, especially workers, don’t give a shit about such company-wide proclamations. They just want their paycheck and to enjoy a pleasant enough work environment. Especially in today’s employment climate, more often than not most people are happy simply to have a job. Screw the flowery “company culture.” Worrying about the “company culture” is hardly a pressing factor if you’ve been unemployed for 2 months. “Company culture” is a hollow First World problem that is nice to think about but grueling to uphold as some kind of meaningful principle.

The CEO types and Career Cultists need to get their heads out of their collective ass and actually talk and think like real workers. But you see, this is all thinly disguised elitism which exists in abundance within the corporate ranks as witnessed by the inconsistent standards of accountability that permeate all levels of the normal corporate vertical structure.

  • E. Rekshun

    … erects an edifice of artificiality…

    Erect…tee hee…

    • Socially Extinct

      ‘edifice of artificiality’ … dildo. tee hee!

  • Socially Extinct

    @: http://bkctmoapghow.wordpress.com/

    Thanks for the link back and I’m glad to be a token member lol

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  • Paul M

    I have been working in and around government my whole career, and I can safely say that private enterprise is full of bullshit that the government (used to) be free of. A government department doesn’t need to navel-gaze to be told its “mission” or “vision” – it’s right there in the fucking legislation that brought it into being. I never understood Dilbert until they privatised a government body I was working for. It changed almost overnight from people doing their jobs and serving the public to circus of bullshit.

    There’s one meeting I’ll never forget. I worked for a private company outsourcing to government in Canberra (a stupid and expensive way of doing things, BTW), and there was a big interstate telephone conference where some suit in Sydney told the people who actually did the work out on the vvarious sites across Australia site about the latest excecutive reshuffle. The ten or so of us Canberrans were openly laughing at this clown on the other end of the line who was supposed to be our “boss”, while he waffled about vision and mission. The local manager had to hit the mute on the phone while we laughed.

    One young bloke asked, “so, are there going to be more resuffles after this one, or will it all settle down for a while?” Answer: “waffle waffle marketplace waffle waffle responsiveness to the unexpected waffle”. After the suit has finished, I piped up and said: “That was a ‘no’.” Cue laughter, and mute.

    • Your Lowness

      Great story.

      I am amused by people, mostly Americans, who are quick to denigrate the public sector here as inefficient, which it is. But they turn right around and waltz into their hallowed private sector job which of course is exempt from all that, right? I wanna slap them across the face, man. The private sector is just as inefficient and badly run as the post office because ultimately, it’s people running the show and people are generally really not that bright.

      • But here is a difference.
        The government dweeb knows that he/she has you by the balls. It is not like you can go to someplace OTHER than the DMV to get your D. L. Or if you need to pull permits. Or dealing with one’s taxes. Social Security.
        In the private sector, most of the time, there is competition. Thus if someone does not like dealing with company A for whatever, they can try company B.
        But you are right. My company has a LOT of chiefs and the Indians, well we are lucky to have a job, right?
        Oh, can I use that analogy on this site?! LOL!

        • “But here is a difference.
          The government dweeb knows that he/she has you by the balls. It is not like you can go to someplace OTHER than the DMV to get your D. L. Or if you need to pull permits. Or dealing with one’s taxes. Social Security.”

          Exactly; therein lies a major difference. Plus the State has guns; corporations don’t; the State can compel people to do their will, in a way corporations can’t…

          “But you are right. My company has a LOT of chiefs and the Indians, well we are lucky to have a job, right?
          Oh, can I use that analogy on this site?! LOL!”

          No; you should say “Too many Emperors and not enough Indios.” ;)

          • Will, sorry to use the wrong analogy! LOL! But I DO like yours.
            And exactly spot on the BIG difference between the state and private industry. Obamacare is proof positiive that the state can do whatever it wants. Look at the issue of religious groups HAVING to pay for contraception. They do not want to. But in the end, they may have to unless the abomination is repealed. And if the state provides your health care, then THEY will tell you what will and will not be covered. And trust me, it will not be what we have now, imperfect as it is.
            I think, frightfully, the private sector is becoming more like the government because so many people go to “business school”.
            Business school?! Really?! Did the great titans of the private sector go to “business school”? Hell frickin no!

  • “Why do you want to work for this company?”

    “Because I heard you were hiring and I want a fucking job, asshole!”

    Too bad you can’t answer honestly, eh?

    • Your Lowness

      Precisely. Too much romanticizing going on.